October Favorites


Good Morning my loves and Happy Fri-YAY!!!!

Today I’m just going to go through all of my favorite products and fashion pieces for the month of October!!! I have no idea where the month went. Anymore I feel like time flies by so fast. But without further hesitation here are my October Favorites!!!!

1)Master Palette By Mario


This palette has been my everything this month! I just did a review on this palette this week. If you have not read it please head over and do so. There is not enough good things I can say about this product! Easy to apply,blend, stays on all day long and the colors just scream fall!! I love it!!

2)Vamp Liquid Lipstick- ABH


Vamp Liquid lipstick by Anastasia Beverly Hills, has been my staple for the month of October! I mean this color is so in this year! But there is obviously a reason why I love this brand of liquid lipstick over any other! Well It is because this stuff literally stays on through E V E R Y T H I N G! I am not kidding. You can eat, drink and kiss and this bad boy isn’t moving! I have only had to reapply my inner lip once throughout the a million times I have worn this stuff. AMAZING!!

3)Neutrogena Oil-Free Acne Wash


Oldie but a goodie my friends!! This stuff got me through high school with no blemishes!!! For whatever reason I gave it up and moved to Purity face wash by Philosophy! Now I love that stuff too but this face wash is awesome! It clears up my face and keeps pimples far away! SOLD!

4)Olay Complete All Day Moisturizer


Again and oldie! My mom got me hooked on this stuff YEARS ago!! I ventured off and on to bigger, more expensive things but this month I came right back to ride or die! During the fall and winter month my skin is SUPER dry. This stuff helps me combat all of that and leave me all moisturized and comfortable. Plus side, its  not a billion dollars! Mama’s on a budget recently!

5)Forever 21 Thigh High Boots


The obsession is real my friends! These boots are everything and more! I originally found them in a tan color and I wear those on a daily basis. These black ones were bought on wimp because I love my tan ones so much! They are also super affordable.

Well my loves that’s all I have for this month! If you have any request of things I should review please comment below or email me! Stay Gorgeous!!




Master Palette by Mario Review!!!!!

Well my loves, the review I have been itching to do is finally here!

If you know me, you know that my obsession with Anastasia Beverly Hills is real! I love everything about her products. When I heard Mario was collaborating with her I was sure it was going to be  something big! This my dears did not disappoint!

As you can already see the colors in this palette just scream “FALL OBSESSION.”It has been my obsession for the month of October! But lets get into the Pros and the Cons shall we!!


So so so many pros with this palette. First the colors. All of the colors are a dream to me! Every single color is super pigmented and easy to blend. The colors are also build able. In other palettes that I have used once you start to build you lose some of the colors as you go. This does not happen with the Mario palette.

Can we talk about the brush for a moment? This brush I loved in the Modern Renaissance palette and love it in this one too. It makes blending and apply so much easier to me!

The best part to me about this palette is that the colors stay vibrant all day long. They don’t fade. Sometimes I start my day looking like a movie star. Then I get home look in the mirror and I look like the hot mess express just pulled in! Not cute ladies! Then I start thinking how many people saw me today looking like this! Have no fear, this will not happen with this palette!!



Well there is only one CON that I can come up with. That is the fall out that occurs with the shades. You need to remember to tap off all of the excess product before applying it to your face. This will help eliminate all the crazy fall out. But just a word of advice, this happens to many palettes I have used. Before you apply your foundation just apply your eye makeup. That was if there is fall out you can wipe away the makeup on your face with a makeup remover pad and go about your business. If you forgot and put on your face makeup, before your eyes “bake” your under eye area with translucent powder!

(If anyone wants me to show them how I do this just let me know in comments section!!)

That my loves is all!!! I highly suggest this palette though I do believe it is limited edition! So try to grab it ASAP and try it out!! Stay Gorgeous!!

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(Both looks created with this palette!)




Monday Morning Mantra, Winner Reveal and My Crazy Weekend!


Good Morning babes! I hope this posts reaches everyone well!!

My weekend was a bit crazy! It started on Friday as I took a mental health day. Ya know a day where you can relax, do nothing and binge watch Friends while shoving enormous amounts of popcorn in your face! Usually these days, for me at least never go as planned. But this one my friends absolutely did! #mommywin

Until 7pm when I went to go drop off my oldest daughter Gabriella to her father’s about 40 minutes away from me. Now before I get started with this story I am going to tell you one thing. I can not and will not leave any animal on the side of the road, EVER. I have never been that person and this quality has gotten me in some shit over the years. This time is no different!

Anyways, as I am driving down a super busy road there are cars flashing for over a mile. In my head I’m thinking wow there must be a lot of cops or a lot of deer. Well I was wrong, there was a white pit bull who looked hurt on her right side running in and out of traffic. I pull over open my door and she runs over to my car and jumps right in.

Now just a back story. A friend on Facebook needs to place her 2 dogs into a nice home. Well my hand goes up way high as the person to adopt these gorgeous babes! Then I sit my ass right down after my boyfriend tells me no more dogs! (we already have a dog named Bailey!!)

So now what do I do now that I have this dog?? Well panic obviously! I can’t leave her on the road and I can’t take her home. No one I know can take her either so I resort to Facebook for help! No one can help. So the night goes on. Adam is mad at me, my own dog is mad at me, oh yeah then I realize the pit bull who I named Lady for the time she was with us is not spayed. My dog is not spayed, and she is in heat. SHOOT ME IN THE FACE RIGHT NOW!

When it’s time to go to sleep I make a bed for Lady in my room put my Bailey in the kitchen, Adam sleeps on the couch and the girls in their beds. All is well right?? NOPE! At to 2 am I wake up to realize Lady has FLEAS! I again panic and rush her to the tub and proceed to give her a flea bath and take the flea comb to her. Now, before I knew she has fleas Adam had said…

” Liz this dog probably has fleas! You have no idea what she has she needs to be gone!”

And now I have just proven him right. Wonderful. After her bath I look at Facebook and someone claims the dog is theirs! Oh praise the lord! That turns out to be a quick fail but not before I drive to this person at 2 am for them to tell me that Lady is not theirs. The woman was lucky she was still standing.

The next morning the dog warden called me to pick her up and so did a foster home. So I dropped the dog off and went with my best friend, her husband and mother to go see Jersey Boys on Broadway!!!

If you have not seen Jersey Boys, you need to! It is probably in my top 3 shows I have ever seen!! It was a fantastic day of day drinking, site seeing and show watching!! Jersey Boys will be gone as of January 24, 2017 so get your tickets now my friends. I promise you will not be disappointed!




Thank you everyone!! Don’t forget there is a giveaway every month! I will announce the next giveaway next week. Please do not be discouraged! I have so much more in store!!! The next giveaway will be announced next week.

Monday Mantra


 So your carrying around all kinds of guilt? I think everyone does at some point in life. There are so many things throughout the years that I wish I could change. So many things that I feel guilty for to this day. But the fact of the matter is that I can’t change anything now that happened 1,3 or 10 years ago. There is going to be so many times in your life time that you could of gone about things differently. Life is basically a trial and error kind of deal. You live, make mistakes, learn from those mistakes and do better the next time around. Don’t beat yourself up over things. You are human.

As a parent I can tell you, it is the hardest job on the planet. You will make more mistakes then you can ever imagine. Most of the time you will feel like you are failing. I know I do. But in retrospect you aren’t. You are killing the parenting game and being overly hard on yourself. So stop that nonsense. At the end of the day all that matters is that you are a good person, who has good intentions. If things go wrong it’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes its for bigger and better thing to come together. You just gotta have faith!

Hope everyone has a great Monday!  STAY GORGEOUS my loves!




Favorite Forever 21 Jewelry!

To say that I love Forever 21 would be and understatement. I seriously think it is an amazing store that is affordable and has great items for sale! Whenever I walk in there or go shopping online I always find the best things! But the place can be a bit overwhelming. Today let’s break down my current favorite jewelry pieces!


Now I’m not going to lie. When I first tried on these ring I thought, who the hell would wear these. My thought was that they were uncomfortable and they looked weird. As the night went on they grew on I have been wearing them almost everyday ever since.

For me they are so easy to pair with outfits. Weather you are dressing up or dressing down they go with nearly anything!

Okay, so is anyone else super excited that choker necklaces are making a come back? My 12 year old self is currently jumping for joy! This necklace is life right now. I mean look at it. It’s simply gorgeous. Elegant and simple all in one. Not to mention it is 4.99 at Forever 21. SOLD! 

I LOVE earring. Unfortunately I don’t wear them as much as I would like because my 1 year old pulls at them. The top pair I picked up about a month ago and I wear them out all the time or for more casual outings. The bottom ones (sorry for the not so great picture) I wear to work all the time. Out of the two the bottoms ones are my favorite but I love them both. These earring aren’t heavy at all and completely comfortable. I get so many compliments on the both of them and usually get into a 10 minute conversation about them. Starting with…

 “I got them from Forever 21 for 3.99.”

I highly suggest you go to forever 21 to check out their accessories. They are super inexpensive and great looking. But do realize this stuff is fake. That means don’t shower with them on or sleep with them on. They will fade, and not look great as the day you first bought them!. Remember this is Forever 21 not Zales.

Well I hoped you like this my loves. As always STAY GORGEOUS!!



Dear Mommy Who Feels Like A Failure


So your fully convinced you are fucking up your children beyond compare huh? You were rushing to get your 3 kids and yourself to school, daycare and work on time. It’s snowing outside and you almost left the stove on boiling your eggs. You get out of the house in the nick of time to get to the school kid drop off line and find that your daughter has no winter jacket on. You lose it! Because..


Her response is “I’m sorry mommy.” as she walks away towards the front door of her Elementary school. Immediately you feel a complete wave of what the fuck did I just do rush over you. As you pull away you realize you have more then enough time to run home, grab the jacket and bring it to school. So your whole break down, drama bullshit you just pulled on your 6 YEAR OLD was completely unnecessary! I mean really whose the adult here!

Oh wait, that was me less then an hour ago! Now I’m sitting here thinking how much worse of parent I can possibly get. The thing is there is no parenting book with step by step instructions on how to deal with things. There is no perfect parent. I think we all for the most part are figuring it out as we go and hoping for the very best. But regardless you have times where you just feel lost and hopeless.

So your in the same boat as me? Or maybe one day you will be. I’m here to tell you that it will all be okay. You are not a failure. You, my dear are doing the very best you can and that is all anyone can ask of you. Take that moment, where you lost your head and use it as a teaching moment. Show your child that from time to time mommy loses her temper. Explain that you are human and it happens and though its not okay to yell its okay to express your feelings. Apologize to your child when you are in the wrong. You hurt them and realize you are wrong. Show them the strength in an apology. There is no such thing as a super mom. Sorry my friends! If you think you are

Above all else, give yourself a break. Life gets hard you strong mama you. Your dealing the best way you can and making the best of every situation, no matter how messed up it is. Your learning right along side your children, and like them you will have moment of great success and moment of utter failure. But in that failure you will realize you have showed them something much more. You will show them how to pick yourself up and just keep swimming. In turn they will use that knowledge in their own lives as they grow to be resilient, strong and productive adults when the time comes. Your doing great mama! Stay Gorgeous!

(Special thank you to the lovely people I work with. They are the real ones who helped me create this post! You guys are amazing and I love each and every one of you!)





Why waking up early is good for the soul!


So your not a morning person! Well be prepared to have a revelation my dear! Morning can be quite amazing and enjoyable, if you do it right. So how do you do it right? Well hold on to your panties because I’m about to tell you.
Currently it is 5:29am on a Wednesday in October. I have already been up for over an hour. OK well partially because my one year old gem woke up and I couldn’t fall back asleep. But either way up for over an hour already. So what do you do in instances like this. Most would probably turn on the T.V praying for another hour of sleep.

I get it girl! Believe me being a morning person was not always my thing either. Ask my college best friend, who would come into my room every day around 12pm asking me when exactly I was going to show my face to the world! Cher would drag me out of bed after her noon class to get me food. And to this day I swear she’s the reason I didn’t starve my first semester in college. Thanks girl!!

But there has to be a reason why I started waking up early right? Yeah there is and here they are…..

1) It’s quite.

Yeah baby speak to my soul! If you are a mommy you know the power of silence. It’s a life saving element that keeps you sane. Waking up at 5 am is the quite time of my day. I can meditate without having to worry (most of the time) about any of the four other human’s that live with me. It is the one time all day long that I am by myself, sitting with my coffee enjoying the taste instead of suckling it down like an a fiend trying find a fix. I tell you this is prime time ladies. I used to think my mother was insane for waking up at 5 am growing up. Now I  completely get her madness! Take advantage!

2) You have all the time in the world.

Well if you work it out right this is 100% true. Any other time of day I can guarantee you are rushing to finish something, go somewhere or pick up someone. At 5am who the hell needs to rush! Today I cleaned my bathroom, took a lavender bath, bathed with my energizing morning wash and currently I’m sitting in my bath robe drinking my coffee writing to you lovely folks! Waking up this early gives you the boost you need to kill the day! 


Have you ever watched the sun come up in the woods in upstate New York? No? Well my love if you do reside in New York, you are missing out on something completely beautiful. Fall in New York is gorgeous, to look at! I hate the climate changes but the turning of the leaves, the pinkish orange sky as the sun rises over the mountain’s is such an amazing sight to see. It’s relaxing really and in those moment I think ” Wow, this is the best place on earth. Even better then the…. eh no the beach is definitely better but this is a close second!” Take a moment to take it in, breath in, breath out and relax. 

4) You can get things done.

If the night before you have not finished the dishes or laundry, you can do it at this time. For me, I have anxiety if my house is in shambles. Starting off and ending in a good spot eliminates that. It also gives my children a clean canvas in the morning. By clean canvas I mean they can make a brand new mess and not pile it on top of the disaster they made the night before. Also if you work out, I suggest you do it in the morning. Working  out will wake you up and give you the energy you need for the day. It also gets it out of the way. Days can easily get crazy and before you know it’s 8 pm and you are dreading the workout that is still not done. Really there is no downside.

5) You can focus on you.

 I know I mentioned this before but I need to touch on it again! How many times a day do you really get to sit down and just focus on yourself? Take this time to just sit and focus on you. Weather it be painting your nails, taking a bath, drinking your coffee and catching up on your favorite show or working out. Just take this time for you. The first hour you are awake sets the tone for the rest of the day, so why not make it a calm and relaxing first hour. When your in a good spot everyone else you come into contact with will feel that energy!

Once waking up early becomes a habit and part of your routine, you will realize what you were missing. How great it is to enjoy the wonderful morning air and cup savor your cup of Joe!

Hope everyone enjoys there Wednesday! I also hope I inspired someone of you to take advantage of the early morning hours. As always, STAY GORGEOUS!



My Weekend Events,Giveaways and Chit Chat!

Good morning my loves! Hope everyone had a great weekend! My weekend was packed with all kinds of stuff!!

For starters, last week on Tuesday our washing machine broke! For a family of 5, all children under the age of 6 and a boyfriend that is a pest control technician, I can assure you my friends this was the worst thing that could of gone, household appliance wise. Welp, nothing we could have done. We called the landlord and I told myself everyday…

“There is nothing you can do. It will all be fine. Maybe by the grace of God he will send me a fairy god mother to do all the laundry!!”

Needless to say by half time of the Dolphins VS Bills game we had a working washer and a brand new sink faucet! (Our sink also sprung a leak!) I never thought in a million years I would get excited about a faucet but ladies…..


….do you see this beauty! I LOVE IT! Crazy how things change once you are forced to adult!

Anyways, I also kept myself busy doing Halloween makeup! If you know me or follow me on any sort of social media, you know that I am a makeup fanatic. I mean I’m all about buying liquid lipsticks for $20.00 because for me, it’s worth it! I figured I would try my hand in doing something makeup related but out of my realm a bit. This is what I came up with.

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The first picture is a creepy Fortune Teller and the second is a half skeleton face. For my first time I was super happy with how they came out! I got awesome feedback too along with tons of questions! What I’m thinking about doing is makeup tutorials on YouTube. I will link everything on the blog when I start everything up!

Now for the giveaway. The deadline is coming up faster and faster. October 28th at 12 midnight that will be it ladies. So don’t forget to subscribe!!! The winner will be announced on November 1st. That person will have up until November 4th at midnight to respond to me. If you do no I will be picking someone else. So please look st your emails!

Lastly, don’t forget to go out this week and be the best, most amazing kick ass woman you can possibly be. Prove people wrong, go after your dreams and make shit happen! Be the best person you can possibly be in a world that is lacking kindness and people who care. And as always my loves, STAY GORGEOUS!



3 Reasons Woman Need To Go Vote!

Well my ladies, it is almost time to vote for the new President of the United States of America. Regardless of where you stand in politics, every single woman needs to go out and vote. This post is by no means to sway your decision on who to vote for. It is to inform you of why woman need to vote!

Okay, so why should you head out to the polls this November ladies? I mean the candidates we have are less than tolerable. But either way these are the two gems we have to pick  from. But lets just take in some facts shall we?

As woman there are struggles that men just do not face. For starters pay for men and woman are not even remotely the same. In reality woman are paid thousands of dollars less than men that hold the same jobs and do the same job functions. Fair, eh I don’t think so! We are still fighting this battle and slowly, very slowly winning it. Recently I have seen such an influx is #girlbosses. Woman that are taking charge and steam rolling industries that were previously run by men! YAS GIRLS!!!!

Here are 3 good reasons why you should vote in the election this year.

1) Woman, you are damn lucky.

If you pay the slightest attention to the news, you would know the struggles woman are still facing in different parts of the world. Overseas woman have no rights. No right to go to school, to wear what the choose and definitely no right to vote. Woman are looked at as a possession and not a person with a valid, intelligent opinion on anything. They are forced to wear clothing from head to toe, faces covered (suddenly school uniforms don’t seem so bad!) and it’s unacceptable to talk directly to males in many cases.

You can actually see this first hand in the United States as well. People that have a cultural background of woman not being important bring that mentality with them when they immigrate. I have first hand had to put a man in his place when he completely ignored me when I was speaking to him. Just to speak to my boyfriend behind me. Adam did give him the same answer which made it even worse! 

Though the struggles in the United States regarding woman equality is still something we face, it is nothing compared to what I just spoke of. I mean for God’s sake we have a WOMAN running for President!

2) Thing won’t change unless you make them.

Everyone in the peanut gallery can voice what they think should happen in our country. What they believe would make the land of the free because of the brave a grade A place to live. That doesn’t happen by small talk you have with your friends. You need to go out and do something about it. The Presidential candidates have voiced what they plan on doing to make our country “great again.” But that’s not something they can just do. They need us to back them up.

So what ever way your swing sways, you need to go and support what you believe is the better of the two. Each one has valid points on what our country is lacking. But sitting in your lazy boy recliner yelling at the T V screen will prove nothing come November. You then, if you do not vote have no room to complain about who is elected because you lacked the desire to vote. Sorry Sally tough shit. 

3) It is a right woman fought for.

WOMAN BEFORE US FOUGHT FOR OUR RIGHT TO VOTE! (yes I’m screaming!) Little history lesson. Voting has not always been a right woman held. (*GASP*) I know right! Crazy! But it’s true. Woman during the 1800’s were basically people who birthed children, cooked and cleaned. Opinions on any matter the was considered a male issues, such as politics, woman were not involved. 

A woman named Susan B Anthony was a highly educated woman and a leading figure in the woman’s rights movement. She along with her supporters of woman created American Equal Rights Association in 1866. In 1869, Anthony and another woman, Elizabeth Stanton ended up writing a weekly publication, The Revolution. In this publication it lobbied for woman’s rights. 1869 The Woman’s Suffrage Association was founded.

Anthony was tireless in her efforts to convince other woman to express that they had a right to vote. She even took it as far as voting illegally in 1872 in the presidential election. She was arrested, assaulted by the officers and ended up fighting the charges brought against her. Though her fight ended in a $100.00 fine that she never paid! (Take that Uncle Sam!)

Unfortunately Susan B. Anthony would not see her vision come full circle. In 1906 Anthony passed away at the age of 86. It was not until 14 years later that the 19th amendment  giving adult woman the right to vote was passed.

Moral of the story, get your asses out to vote. For woman before us have put it all on the line for us to be able to vote today. Do not take it for granted. Ever. 

So is that enough to get you to go out in vote? I hope it sure was because there is nothing more important then exercising a right we have earned and should be proud of. You should hold your head high, like the bad as you are and take that right to the polls!!! I’ll see you there!!

Stay Gorgeous!!



When Negative Nancy takes over.

Hey Babes and Happy HUMP Day!! Hope everyone is surviving the week the best way they can. If your not I have come to give you your half way through the week inspiration.


Okay, so we all know someone who is a Negative Nancy. They may not at all be a bad person, but these people tend to see the bad in every situation. Sometimes it gets to be to draining on people.

I personally know someone like that and I have had to put some distance between us. It’s not that I don’t like them, my brain just needs some time away. But time away is not going to solve the problem right. You need to be proactive without being rude.

Now though people like this can be so damn frustrating, and yes there are times when I wanna be like…

“Girl, you need to find a hobby, find a boyfriend, get laid. Just get the hell away from me with your draining self.”

But in all actuality that’s not anyway to treat anyone. Hurting someone is no way to deal with a person that A) may not have any idea that they are being the Negative Nancy and B) may have done this there whole life and this is how they relate to people. Is it a good thing, well no but its a behavior they have learned and they need to know with you, that not how it’s going to go down.

To be frank with everyone, I have been the Negative Nancy in my own group of friends. Yep, that was me. And as someone who was the cause of anxiety for so many people because of my negative attitude I had to look deep down on how to change it around for the better. So where does one start? How do you change the negative behavior and way of thinking. Well first you need to come up with why you feel so negative about everything. For me I was unhappy with the life I was living. I had planned my life out and things were not going as planned. Well shocker, life didn’t go as I planned it! I mean really whose does?

(to those of you that are thinking, well mine did. Take a seat, or many seats this post is not for you!)


So I started changing things in my life I was not happy with. I started off with my diet. Believe it or not that is a huge factor. Junk food slows your ass down. Literally. You are unhealthy, you gain weight, your tired from all the nasty things you are eating and water seems to be just something you shower in and don’t consume. That’s a problem folks. But how do you change your diet. I had to research. It sounds crazy I know but I honestly had never been on a diet prior. With no idea of where to start I took to the internet and got advice from people who were physically fit. The end result was me joining Beach Body, working out everyday and eating healthier then I ever had before.

(Rule of thumb for those who don’t want to work out. It’s an 80-20 rule. 80% what you eat, 20% working out. Keep that in mind)

Next I changed the way I looked at situations day to day. I tend to make situations a lot bigger then they actually need to be. Look at the situation. If it not going to matter 5 years from now don’t spent 5 minutes worrying about it. Stressing over things out of your control is also not something to focus on. If you personally can not fix it, LET IT GO!

When I started to look at my life as something that I was in control of, things started to change. Be in control. Every situation can’t be controlled but how you react to the situation certainly can. Breath. It’s the best advice I can give!

So now the problem isn’t that you are the negative person. It’s Captain Complainer over in the corner mad that the water cooler doesn’t make the water cold enough. Now what do you do? Well my dear start with a clear head. You need to be in the right frame of mind to help someone like this. That means your not going to beat this person with the sarcastic stick.

Okay, now lay on the positivity. I have said it over and over. The vibes you throw out into the universe are felt by all in your path. So the best way to combat someone who is negative is to show them the positive in the situation. So they say…

” Yeah it is a nice day out. But winter is coming soon and that is horrible. Ugh!”

Your response could be…

” I know the cold sucks, but the snow does look pretty that time of year! And winter fashion! You love your boots!”

If all goes well, she will then focus on how cute her boots are going to look in the 15 feet  of snow and suddenly winter isn’t as bad as it was 10 seconds ago.

What I have learned is coming back with a positive comment every time seems to change the tone of the conversation quite fast. Because not only do people pick up on the negative the also are more likely to pick up on the positive. People like to be around other people that are going to help them be a better person. Even if they don’t realize it.

Lastly, if you have not noticed I am a huge fan of inspirational quotes. Put them every where. Sound silly?? Not really. People that tend to look at something positive or even something they want to achieve on a daily basis, tend to achieve their goals or change their way of thinking over time. Proven fact, promise! This is not saying you don’t have to work hard for the things you want but you my friend, you be the push in the positive direction that person needs. Be helpful, be understanding, be kind. You never know what this other person is going through. Help them through it. Help them see the positive in life. Sometimes that is really all a person needs.

Stay Gorgeous






Kids, the root of why I’m insane.

Disclaimer: This post will contain high volumes of cursing, kid bashing and over all ranting. If one or any of the previous things above is not okay with you, please exit top right please. (sorry mom!)


SO ladies, I am going to say what all mothers feel but are afraid to say. SOMETIMES our children are assholes!

There I said it! Though it may be frowned upon to say such things, its not illegal so take that! Regardless of how great of a parent you are, sometimes your children just decided to show you how bratty, bitchy and an overall pain in the ass they can truly be. In turn pushing you to limits no mother has been before.

Now now, I know what your thinking…..

“Elizabeth, kids will be kids. You must understand that.”

Well, yeah. But sometimes our kids are complete fucking morons and we cant stand them. I did not say we didn’t love them. There is a difference my critical friend. Let me let you in on a little secret, we all feel this way at one point or another.


For instance, when your child who knows better has a full blown melt down in the middle of the store. People stop and stare at this epic melt down as if you were the one that instigated it. They are also looking at you handle it in a manner they wouldn’t. Because everyone at that moment becomes the perfect parent and is now the kid whisperer. Believe me loves, I have been there and it takes all of me to keep my cool and not go all psycho, crazed lunatic on them. Like bitch you can do a better job?? Well lace up your boots because your about to step in some shit you can’t handle! But you know, that would be completely inappropriate.


So why do they do that from time to time? For me, my children have a break down at the busiest times of the day. Like while I’m trying to cook dinner, change a diaper and keeping an eye on the laundry, someone will ask me for a cup of juice. Oh sure ma’am ill be right on that because clearly mommy is not doing a fucking thing over here. Yes just one moment and you will have your juice, oh and a leprechaun riding a unicorn holding a pot of gold and Disney World tickets is also wanted. Sure coming right up!

Get the fuck out of here! Ain’t nobody have time for that. Where’s my glass of Sangria, better yet the bottle. Who needs a cup I’ll drink this shit straight!

But there is no age limit on your kids assholeness. No ma’am there is not. I know damn well at the ago of 18 I had the biggest attitude to rock the household the resided at 265 Foxhill Road. My mother, though she will deny any such thing probably wanted to kill me more times then not. She probably wanted to throw around a few curse words too. But that’s not my mother. She bit her tongue a lot. Well mother I feel the pain I put you through. Well played God, well played!

Through all of the times I feel like my life is ending at the hands of a three year old, there are more good times then bad. So mommy’s if your having a bad day and your child is being an asshole. I can guarantee and hour from now you will forget all about the hell your child just put you through and focus on the great amazing things that you love about them. That’s the roller coaster ride of being a parent. Just when your about to lose your sanity, they show you how much they love you and how great of a parent you truly are! Keep trucking my loves, being a mommy is a hard ass job! You got this!

I hope this made you giggle, please don’t take anything seriously. I mean because I’m not. Or am I?


Stay Gorgeous!