Dear Mommy Who Feels Like A Failure

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So your fully convinced you are fucking up your children beyond compare huh? You were rushing to get your 3 kids and yourself to school, daycare and work on time. It’s snowing outside and you almost left the stove on boiling your eggs. You get out of the house in the nick of time to get to the school kid drop off line and find that your daughter has no winter jacket on. You lose it! Because..

“I TOLD YOU TO GRAB THE WINTER JACKET OF THE COAT RACK! WHY WAS THAT SO HARD!”

Her response is “I’m sorry mommy.” as she walks away towards the front door of her Elementary school. Immediately you feel a complete wave of what the fuck did I just do rush over you. As you pull away you realize you have more then enough time to run home, grab the jacket and bring it to school. So your whole break down, drama bullshit you just pulled on your 6 YEAR OLD was completely unnecessary! I mean really whose the adult here!

Oh wait, that was me less then an hour ago! Now I’m sitting here thinking how much worse of parent I can possibly get. The thing is there is no parenting book with step by step instructions on how to deal with things. There is no perfect parent. I think we all for the most part are figuring it out as we go and hoping for the very best. But regardless you have times where you just feel lost and hopeless.

So your in the same boat as me? Or maybe one day you will be. I’m here to tell you that it will all be okay. You are not a failure. You, my dear are doing the very best you can and that is all anyone can ask of you. Take that moment, where you lost your head and use it as a teaching moment. Show your child that from time to time mommy loses her temper. Explain that you are human and it happens and though its not okay to yell its okay to express your feelings. Apologize to your child when you are in the wrong. You hurt them and realize you are wrong. Show them the strength in an apology. There is no such thing as a super mom. Sorry my friends! If you think you are

Above all else, give yourself a break. Life gets hard you strong mama you. Your dealing the best way you can and making the best of every situation, no matter how messed up it is. Your learning right along side your children, and like them you will have moment of great success and moment of utter failure. But in that failure you will realize you have showed them something much more. You will show them how to pick yourself up and just keep swimming. In turn they will use that knowledge in their own lives as they grow to be resilient, strong and productive adults when the time comes. Your doing great mama! Stay Gorgeous!

(Special thank you to the lovely people I work with. They are the real ones who helped me create this post! You guys are amazing and I love each and every one of you!)

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XOXO

Elizabeth

 

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